Damn you terrorists!
I had to throw out all my explosive beverages!
It's obvious that we need to ban everything, immediately!
What about colon-based explosive-liquid-filled condom IEDs triggered by a digital watch? Anything is possible, right? So let's live in fear and pass insane restrictions.
I say we drug and thoroughly detonate passengers during luggage check-in and then confiscate all surviving iPods, laptops, beverages, shampoo, nail files, pens and pencils and open a nifty duty-free shop to fund the war on terrorism.
We keep going after the tools of terrorism and ignoring the cause - our constant ass-fucking of insane hyper-religious cultures.
EVERYTHING is a terrorist tool! Anyone ever watch Mythbusters? MacGuyver?
But hey, if it saves one life.
I say fuck 'em! Sell fully automatic weapons, hardcore porn, and smack right off the goddamn beverage cart, at least we'll be free. And that way any potential terrorists will have a horny bunch of dope-addled, heavily-armed 'Minuteman' passengers to contend with.
I'm losing it.
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1 comment:
Here-Here!
If shampoo bottles with binary-compound explosive components are banned from all commercial flights, then only the terrorist with have luxurious, silky, hair!
On the MythBusters note: If I can't bring my Diet Coke onto the plane with me, why would I bother buying Mentos at the gift shop?
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